(no subject)

[echolls_cursed]

(from here)

Staggering backwards, Logan growled and bit down on Donald's bottom lip. Sucking lightly on it until it was slightly swollen and puffy.

"That bother you Donald?" he asked as he caught his breath, knowing he'd pushed a button and wondering just how much harder he could press it. ...And wondering just what Donald would do if he did. "Don't you want to know what it was like? Don't you want to hear all about it? Maybe we should ask him to join in sometime. I bet he'd just love that... I know I would."

He wasn't sure what would happen next. If Donald would laugh and agree, or if he'd really lose it. Maybe he'd storm off and break things off again. Maybe he'd laugh and they'd tumble in to bed together. Or maybe, just maybe, Donald would surprise him somehow.

Comments

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

"No," it barely came out a word, more a bark, a command somehow. How could Donald explain he'd slept with Jack once, lifetimes ago, in Cairo. Cairo which seemed so far away, where he'd watched himself break apart, stop being the man he knew and becoming something different. Someone broken and despicable. Clawing his way back had been harder than Donald would admit aloud, and he wasn't entirely done.

"None of it," He pushed Logan back to the bed, knee sliding between his legs as he crouched over the younger man, tugging his shirt upwards and off. "No more sharing. I don't- None of it. I won't. I can't."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Surprise.

Logan was too startled to speak at first, not sure how to react to Donald's tone and actions. His instincts said fight. To bare his teeth and shove the other man right off the bed.

He didn't though, instead lifting his arms to help Donald rid him of his shirt, and watching the other man curiously as he flopped onto his back. The smart move would have been to stay that way. To do as Donald asked and let the conversation die right there. Logan rarely did what was smart though, and he wet his lips before speaking again.

"What part of it do you have a problem with, Donald?" he asked, voice low and even. "The man, or the act?"

Was it Jack that had set Donald off, or simply the thought of Logan on his knees with someone else? Both were interesting. Both were telling. Logan couldn't help his curiosity.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

It had been too much to hope that Logan would have left it alone. Not when it so obviously bothered Donald. Of course he would pick at it, "You don't let scabs heal either, do you?"

He didn't say anything else for a moment, golden hair falling forward over his eyes as he looked down upon Logan. Donald shifted, pushing up off the bed til he rested at the edge of it, knees pressing into the matress.

"Do you want that? Meaningless sex, nameless nearly, it would be if we weren't stuck in this place." Logan had asked for questions, and now he would get them. "It's not Jack - I knew him once, years ago, away from here - it's what it is. I don't want that. This thing, whatever this is. I don't want this to be another missed chance. Something that happened because we'd given up on fighting. Isn't that enough?" He was pleading at the end, wanting to talk of anything else. Not of this.

Donald stood. Stood and stepped back, worried now. "I thought it was- Isn't it what you want?"

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

It took a long moment for Logan to work out what that all meant. Sometimes with Donald there were too many words and not enough thoughts. Still, Logan managed to stitch them together, turning them over and over until it all clicked into place.

"It's not... It's not a missed chance, Donald. It's not, okay? It's... It's not just fucking and it's not just a game. I just got divorced, and I shouldn't even be thinking about getting serious with anyone, but I am. The night's I'm not with you, I lay here and think about how I might be tomorrow night. When I think about you and that guy, I... I want to hit something."

Sitting up, Logan hunched over as he combed his fingers though his dark hair. "I'm totally unstable, you know that, right? I mean, I don't know which way is up half the time these days. I'm an emotional wreck. I'm needy. I'm hurting. I'm still in love with my ex husband, and I hate myself because I know I could love you. I know if I'd let myself... I could really love you. I come from a really fucked up place, and I do really fucked up things. I'm a textbook example of who not to date, Donald. I really am. You think about that for a minute, and then tell me if you're sure I'm what you want. 'Cause I could ruin you, Donald. Just like I ruin everything else I touch."

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

The tables turned, it was his chance to be the one surprised. Donald listened, hearing things he would say himself given half the chance. The perfect example of who not to date. Ruining all they touched. He sat, finally, on the edge of the bed, not facing Logan but the wall.

"I've said before we're too much alike," his fingers splayed flat on the bed, inching closer to Logan's leg but never quite touching. "I'm not exactly the person most would hold up as an ideal partner Logan. I'm better with lies and half truths than with honesty."

And yet he was being honest. Perhaps he'd been driven to it by a need to stop the conversation from going somewhere he was uncomfortable, but he was being honest. He actually had a harder time lying than he'd admit. "I worry. I worry about my past, if I'm only going to repeat the same mistakes over and over. If I'll destroy each and every thing that matters to me, because it's what I know. This is what I need Logan, as strange and mixed up as it is. You, me, however we must be. I've been a fool."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan didn't reply, he wasn't sure he needed to as his fingers found Donald's, holding the other man's hand as they both sat staring ahead rather than at each other. There was something symbolic in it, though it went right over Logan's head, and his brow furrowed slightly before relaxing again.

"Donald," he said, finally breaking the silence as he turned his head to look at the other man. That was as far as he got though, words catching in his throat as he squeezed Donald's hand a bit tighter than he meant to.

Talk was cheep though, and when words failed him, Logan leaned over and rested his forehead on the other man's shoulder. He could smell the other man. He smelled like soap and stuffy old books. Like tropical air and fresh fruits from the kitchen. Where Logan was all saltwater and sweat, Donald was something more refined. Strange how beneath it all they could be so alike.

"If this means anything," Logan said quietly, throat relaxing and letting the words finally slip out. "You'll keep pretending it means nothing. For both our sakes. We'll fuck that much harder, and we'll fight that much louder. We'll hold hands when people aren't looking. You'll teach me shit I don't care about, and I'll take in every last word while I pretend I'm not listening. ...And it'll work. It can work, right? It has to. 'Cause nothing else has so far. Not for me, and definitely not for you."

It was a plea more than a question, and logan swallowed hard as he closed his eyes and waited for Donald to answer.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

The touches had been the reassurance that he'd needed. Fingers tight together and his head turned til his cheek rested against Logan's forehead. Donald kissed him gently eyes closed as he listened to what Logan was saying.

The words in and of themselves were terrifying. It didn't make them less true though, and that was possibly what scared him. Knowing that just by wanting this, by acknowledging it they could break it. It was in their nature, or so it seemed. The way things worked with them.

"It hasn't yet, has it?" Donald spoke just as softly, squeezing Logan's hand. "It doesn't mean that it won't. In fact, I think we've guaranteed that it will. It has to," he sounded less desperate than Logan. He tried his best to sound sure.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan nodded slightly, lifting his head to look Donald in the eye.

"So what do we do now?" he asked.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

"I speak to Josh," it came first, before anything else. It had to be said at the least. Only it didn't need to happen immediately. Not this very moment. "But now?" Donald smiled then, his eyes still sad somehow as he leaned in, lips pressing lightly to Logan's. "I don't know, other than this."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

It wasn't that clean cut and simple, and Logan knew it. It was nice to pretend though, and he returned the kiss softly, his hand finding it's way to Donald's knee.

Everything felt so fragile, and Logan was as still as he could be as he held on to the other man.

It didn't last long though, and soon Logan was longing to feel the tension shatter, Dragging Donald closer as he gasped out the only thing he could think to say. "Remind me. Remind me that I'm..."

Yours.

The word went unsaid, and Logan ducked his head to sink his teeth into the other man's neck, marking tender skin until it turned a deep and angry shade of violet, surrounded by a ring of yellow. It probably hurt. It was meant to hurt. Though Logan was quick to kiss the bruised skin the moment he was done, murmuring something softly as he nuzzled Donald's jaw.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

It was a gasp of pain that broke his silence; Donald pulled back though his grip on Logan's arms was tight, nearly bruising.

He hadn't stopped him though. He wouldn't, because it was something he understood. The gentleness was too fragile. They needed something else, something that couldn't be broken.

"God-" One word, broken before his lips crushed against Logan's, tongue forcing it's way past the younger man's lips. He pulled them both down, his knee sliding between the other's legs again, breaking the kiss for just a moment. Just long enough for one more word. The only other thing he had to say, for all that it made his stomach drop and jump in the same moment. "Mine."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

When Donald dragged him down, Logan fought, his hands shoving at the other man's chest and blunt nails clawing at skin. He struggled and he growled... until Donald spoke.

Mine. One little word and Logan just stopped, shivering and going still.

He didn't answer, but he did nod, fingers slipping down Donald's sides and then pulling roughly at the fabric of the other man's shirt. He had it off in moments, tossed aside and forgotten as his fingertips explored skin instead. "Donald," he murmured. "Donald, Donald, Donald..." The words became a chant and slowly melted into a moan as Logan arched against the other man wantonly, wetting his lips.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

The words made him groan, fingers slipping under his waistband, tugging and pulling, finally managing the button. Donald didn't rush, the flats of his hands pressing down Logan's stomach, over his sides and his back. Hips pressed forward into the other man, his mouth finding his neck, the crook of his shoulder. He used his teeth and tongue, the bites harder than they would have been usually, longer as well. There would be marks, he knew that, and he wanted it that way, moaning Logan's name as he kissed down his chest.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan swore softly, his head tipping back as he rubbed against the other man. Every touch sent sparks though him, waking him up and keeping him in the moment as his own fingers fumbled with Donald's pants. He wanted more, and he wanted it now.

"That it?" he asked, taunting Donald with a breathless laugh, as his hand slipped into the other man's pants and cupped him through his boxers. "That all you've got, Donald?"

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

"Always impatient," he huffed out in frustration, though it didn't stop him from grinding into Logan's hand. Donald pulled at Logan's trousers, tugging them and his boxers off, wanting them both naked. "Would you like there to be more?" There was a hint of teasing to his words, his hand ghosting over Logan's bare cock before pressing against him again, kissing him soundly.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan started to growl out something obnoxious in reply, but the words were cut off by Donald's lips, and all that came out was a muffled mess of noise as Logan thrust into the other man's hand and yanked Donald's boxers and pants down and off.

He didn't know what he wanted, he didn't have any plans or ideas. He was working totally on instinct, moving with Donald and letting the mood define their course. Endless thoughts of kinks, fetishes and scenarios ran through his mind, though he voiced none of them. Instead he moaned at his own dirty thoughts and silently wished Donald could read his mind and see all the filthy things he was imagining.

Underneath all that though, in a deeper corner of his mind, there was a much quieter thought. A tiny voice whispering that this was real. That he wasn't alone. He wasn't getting left behind.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

Donald's fingers tightened as Logan thrust upwards, toeing off his trousers and pulling the other man toward him. This wasn't a simple romp, and yet it needed to be. It needed to be everything it always was, and somehow more as well. He stopped thinking. He stopped worrying, or tried to, letting desire take over. It was the only way he'd manage, he'd not be too nervous. The only way he wouldn't make a mess of things.

He smiled when he straddled Logan's chest, reaching up to pin his arms, eyes glinting. It only took a small shift for his cock to press at Logan's lips, his hips pressing forward.

This might not have been the way. It might not have been what he should have done. But it seemed now was the time to push things he might have otherwise left.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan struggled for a moment, twisting in Donald's grip and then going limp as he blinked up at the other man. Logan might have been pinned down, but he didn't feel out of control, not then, not there in that moment. Parting his lips, he dragged his tongue slowly over the tip, keeping his eyes open as long as he could, and then closing them as he lifted his head and took the head of Donald's cock between his lips.

He didn't take him very deep, and the suction was teasing at best. It was slow and defiant, and if Logan could have smirked with his mouth full, he would have.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

His eyes stayed on Logan, on his mouth, as long as they could. Donald let out a shuddering breath knowing that this could be different. He could force him to take more in, but Donald didn't want to. He held himself still as he held Logan down. A strange place to be, where they both had some control. Moaning, he shivered, his fingers digging into the skin at Logan's wrists. "God Logan. Logan."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan made a small noise around the other man's cock, taking him deeper, and then deeper still. His shoulders and neck were already starting to burn from the position, but Logan didn't care. In fact, he wanted it to hurt, needed it to so he could remember what was happening. So he could remind himself that this was real. That Donald wanted him. He moaned as he tried to take a little more, but he couldn't lift his head any higher,

He groaned as he started to bob his head while he sucked.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

Then he couldn't seem to help it. Tense, he pressed forward, moving with the dips of Logan's head. It wasn't something he could manage for long, he never could with the other man's mouth on him. It was a good weakness to have, he supposed, thrusting forward and then pulling back, always amazed by this. Being here, the two of them, his thoughts unknowingly echoing Logan's.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Blinking his eyes open again, Logan squinted slightly as he took a deep breath through his nose, taking Donald as deep as he could and holding his position until his shoulders shook and he had to pull back again. Silently, he urged the otehr man on.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

It was awkward, his spine bowed as he balanced himself with his grip on Logan's wrists. His eyes squeezed shut as he moved, thrusting harder, faster. It broke him, having this control right then, having Logan want this. When he came he shouted, pulling back but not out of his mouth. Donald held himself for a moment, the muscles in his stomach tensing before he just couldn't, collapsing beside the younger man, kissing him.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

There was still something about the taste of come that made Logan a little queasy, and yet... And yet he swallowed it, licking his lips before kissing Donald in return and pressing himself up against the other man's side.

Rubbing himself off against Donald's thigh, Logan could have come just like that, the friction and the contact enough to get him hard. It was everything else that got him going though. The way his wrists ached and the taste of Donald on his tongue. The sweat beading on the other man's brow, and the burn of his shoulders. His body ached and he rocked hard against the other man, panting as he buried his face against Donald's neck and wrapped an arm around the other man's waist.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

Shifting, Donald faced Logan, his hand glancing over his ass, pressing in at the top of his thighs. "You drive me to distraction," he murmured, his face buried in hair as he moved against Logan, the contact nearly too much this soon

His breath was sharp and fast; the sounds he made nearly whimpers. "Steal into a classroom one night," Donald had no idea why he said it, what had come over him, "alone, just us."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan's breath caught at that, his body shuddering as he started to rub a little faster against Donald. He whimpered as he hid his face against warm skin, hands holding on tightly as the tips of his fingers dug into the other man's hip and shoulder.

"Shit, Donald," he managed to gasp, rocking harder and holding his breath as he came. It was over too soon, but Logan couldn't have held on any longer, not after all that had been said and done. Gasping for breath, he embraced the other man, panting hard and then lifting his head slightly to find Donald's lips with his own.

[homerinexile.livejournal.com]

There was a relief to it; a madness that had found them exercised by what they'd done. He laughed, a breathy, relieved sound, finding that he felt saner, more himself. Kissing Logan, his hands moved, fingers twining in hair, brushing over his neck and shoulders. "I told you. Distraction."

Of the very best sort.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

Logan laughed, the sound louder than he meant it to be as he fumbled around blindly for a towel and cleaned them both off as best he could manage.

"Stay," he said quietly. "Tonight, just... stay here, yeah?"

It was too hot for blankets, and Logan kicked them to the floor before slipping under the sheet and tugging it up to cover Donald as well.

He didn't wait for the other man to agree even, he just draped an arm around him and held on. He didn't know how early or late it was, and he didn't care. He just wanted to lay there with Donald a while longer, oblivious to the rest of the island and the people on it.