(Jack, Joe - 10/16)

[echolls_cursed]

So, okay, he hadn't gone to see the dinosaurs, but he had gone up to the mountain. It hadn't been a long trip or a long stay. Gone on Tuesday, back by Thursday morning. Nothing monumental or exciting had happened, and whatever it was he'd been hoping to find out there hadn't been found.

Still, Linus had enjoyed the trip, and a few days away from the world had helped clear his head a little.

The hut was starting to get a little untidy again, but he made no move to clean anything up, dumping his bag out on the table and tossing the dirty laundry in a pile in the corner before putting down the food he'd grabbed for Linus at the compound when he'd stopped off for a shower.

In fact, his hair was still damp, and when he heard someone head up the steps to his stilted hut he raked his fingers through it, causing it to stand on end as he glanced over to see who it was.

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[captainjack.livejournal.com]

As slowly as it built up, the release took what seemed like forever. Every thrust dragged another pulse from him and he groaned Logan's name as he nuzzled against his neck and kissed wherever his lips met skin.

When the tension gone, Jack kissed him once more, slowly and lightly, tongue darting out to tease the curve of his lips. The haze of need and the fog he'd been caught up in slowly vanished. He opened his eyes to look down at Logan, lying there...

Wrapped around him.

Looking like...that.

Jack pulled back to slip free and that was when he realized what he'd done. What had felt so natural. Maybe why it had felt so fucking good.

He took a breath and withdrew, gave him one more kiss and pulled back. The fluid motion just kept going until he was sitting on the edge of the bed, reaching for his pants, all the while fighting to keep himself from looking guilty or conflicted.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

There was a moment of perfection. Somewhere between coming and the feeling of Jack pulling out, Logan had found something worth holding onto. A feeling he rarely got to feel. Though with Jack it was happening more and more, lingering emotions that he'd as good as sworn off after the last time he'd felt his heart shatter right inside his chest. Feelings he'd written off before Jack had come crashing into his life to dig them back up.

And that was the only word for it. Crashing. Even during the most tender of their interludes, Jack seemed to barrel in, knocking Logan's beliefs and rules aside with every kiss and every touch.

That feeling was lost the instant the other man pulled away though, and Logan sat up slowly as he watched Jack scramble for his clothes, preparing for a mad dash.

Maybe someone else would have asked what was wrong, pressed for answers, or held on and tried to get him to stay. But not Logan. He knew all about running, and he wasn't about to tell Jack he should stay.

He wasn't going to insist they talk about their feelings, or ask just what the hell they were doing or where they were going. He wasn't going to cling on or show any need that might have been there. He wouldn't wear his heart on his sleeve, and he wouldn't beg Jack to explain it all to him.

Instead he simply pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them as he looked away.

[captainjack.livejournal.com]

He pulled on his jeans, socks and shoes, giving himself enough time to collect his thoughts. What the fuck was he thinking, coming here all the time. Sleeping. Pushing Logan to violence for his own selfish reasons and then turning around and taking him to bed like that. If there had been candles and champagne and soul music playing it couldn't have made this moment worse.

Jack twisted to look at him and winced as the sore spot on his side twinged, just another fucking reminder of what he could get Logan to do. He wondered for a second of there was really anything he couldn't get him to do.

And then he found himself reaching out to touch him, to keep just a little bit of...something. Jack studied him as he sat there, drawn up and pulled in, looking away. Fucking gorgeous.

"I have to go," he said plainly. No explanation, no apology. He needed to go before he did something stupid. Before they fought again. Before...okay, so it was already too late. He should have left when he woke up.

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

"So go," Logan replied simply, his voice tight before he cleared his throat and blinked away whatever it was he'd been thinking about. "Nothing's keeping you here, Jack."

Looking over at the other man again, he struggled to hide his thoughts and feelings, pushing them down only to have his eyes betray him as he shrugged. His hand shifted slightly though, moving to cover the other man's for a moment. The tips of his fingers brushing over skin and then falling away before it could become more than he wanted it to be.

Jack was leaving, and though his fingers itched to hang on, Logan made no effort to stop him. Even as his gut twisted and his paranoia started to set in.

The violence, the pain... that was nothing. But this morning they'd crossed a line, and Logan couldn't help but be sure that this time Jack wouldn't be back for more later. Or worse. Maybe this time he'd be back even sooner. Then again, and again. Each time crashing harder until all those thoughts and feelings Logan fought so hard to keep in check came spilling out.

[captainjack.livejournal.com]

Nothing keeping him here...right. Right. He nodded sharply, completely discounting the hundred and one things he could read in Logan's eyes and the way he was nearly physically holding things back. Jack had fucked up, and badly. This morning had changed things and all he could think to do was fall back on what he knew best.

Running away.

First, though, he leaned in and gave Logan a wet smack of a kiss on his cheek before he stood up. Maybe time would fix it. Maybe distance. Maybe...something. He wasn't going to puzzle it out now. Not with his shirt slipping over his head and his back to Logan as he tossed out a casual, "See you around."

[echolls-cursed.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, see you," Logan agreed, the words slipping out as Jack walked out the door.

He was still for a long moment, arms still wrapped tightly around his knees as his stomach rolled so hard that he was sure he'd be sick. His chest ached, and every inch of his body felt heavy and tense. Each muscle working hard to keep a tight hold on his emotions.

He staid like that as long as he could, holding his breath without realizing it, and gasping for air when his lungs began to burn.

He needed to get up. He needed to get up and get dressed, and just... get gone. It didn't matter where he went, just anywhere but there. Away from the pillow that still smelled like Jack, and away from the thatched roof he'd stared up at with one lover after another.

Getting to his feet, Logan reached for his wetsuit and began to get dressed. He needed to escape, and there was still only one place where he truly felt free.