echolls_cursed | (no subject)

"Oh, yeah. Yes, so happy," he sighed with a smile. "I've never been so happy in my whole life as I am now. With you. Not now...general now. Being married. Building a home. All of it. Why? Are you happy?"

"I am. I was just asking," Logan shrugged. "I just... I was thinking about that conversation we had a while back. About having a family."

"Oh?" Jack said, growing more serious. He stopped molesting Logan so he could prop himself up on an elbow to look into the man's eyes.

"What were you thinking?" he asked quietly.

"That maybe you're wishing we were starting a family instead of building a huge home," Logan replied honestly.

"We've got plenty of time to have a family, Logan. I kind of like having you all to myself right now," Jack replied. "Call me selfish, but...I want kids, but not right now. I wouldn't say no if we had the opportunity, but I'd rather build a home with you than anything else. It'll happen. It will. I believe that. But I'm in no rush."

"You mean that?" Logan asked. "You're not just saying that to make me feel better or something?"

"I really mean that," he smiled. "Why? Did you think I meant we should find a woman immediately? Or steal a kid? I don't think that would really work."

He chuckled softly.

"I love you, Logan. And one day...one day I'll love our kid, too."

"How can you be so sure it's gonna happen?" Logan asked. "I mean, we could vanish long before a chance like that comes along."

"We're not going to vanished. We promised each other," Jack said, as if that was enough to make it true.

"And since we're not going anywhere, we'll find someone. We will. I don't care how long it takes. We'll have a kid. We'll have a family."

"Okay," Logan replied quietly, pressing closer and settling. "I believe you."

"Are you in a hurry? We could really try...if you want to. We could try to find someone who'd carry your baby," he suggested.

"I'm not in a hurry," Logan replied honestly. "I don't even like thinking about it. It just makes me bitter towards everyone who already has a family."

"But you've got a family. Joe and Anne and Matthew," he said softly. "I know, not the kind of family you mean...but it's something special. I love that you have that. That I'm part of it now."

"I'm not saying it isn't, but it's not the same. You know that. I mean don't get me wrong, I love Matthew like he's my own, and Anne and Joe mean everything to me- but at the end of the day Matthew goes home with his mother."

He wet his lips and sighed. "I'd given up on it, and part of me wishes it could have stayed that way."

"Don't say that. We should have a family. We deserve it as much as anyone else," Jack said. He dropped down to the bed and rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. "I think we'd be good parents."

"I didn't say we wouldn't. I'm saying it's going to be hard. ...I'm saying we have to accept that it might never happen."

"I don't accept that. Nothing's impossible," Jack said defiantly. "If we're patient...if we try...there's got to be a way."

"I just don't like getting my hopes up," Logan replied honestly. "I don't want to get my heartbroken again, alright?"

"I understand that," he replied, turning to kiss Logan's cheek. "We don't have to talk about it. If it happens, it happens. Let's don't worry about it."

"Okay," Logan said quietly, nuzzling Jack's neck and holding on tightly. "Okay, we wont worry about it."

"I think we have enough to worry about with the house, anyway," he chuckled. "You're going to have a palace by the time I'm done. The bathroom alone is going to get us visitors."

"No one is using our bathroom," Logan laughed. "It's mine and I'm not sharing it with anyone but you."

"You're not going to let Joe take a shower?" he laughed. "Greedy. Greedy and selfish. Is there anything else I can make you to one-up the neighbors?"

"How about a moat?" Logan suggested. "Nothing like a moat keep the rif-raf out."

"Oh my god," Jack laughed. "I'm not building you a moat. How about a white picket fence? Isn't that the American dream?"